“so what’s your teacher super power?”

Last week, I was 2 minutes early to a MDT meeting. When I walked in, every one was already chatting about the evaluation results and sharing how the student was doing. I was the only member of the team that didn’t have a relationship with the family and quietly sat down.

About 15 minutes in, me and the family were officially introducing ourselves. After the hand shakes, the students mom said, “so what’s your teaching super power?”

Being totally caught of guard and not having ever debated the answer to this question before, I responded with an “oh my” response. The team shared some insights into their perspectives of my superpowers,which quickly helped this introvert dig into her heart to answer this question honestly.

My little brother.

My little brother is my teaching super power.

I remember hearing my mom tell her friends my brother was being tested for special ed. He was slow at learning and retaining information, wasn’t making friends, had lots of emotions and a difficult time communicating.

I was 13, 5 years older than my brother, and had just lost my father to alcoholism. When I say just, I had lost my father 2 months before my brother had qualified. To make matters more complicated, when we were down in California for my fathers funeral, my brother almost drowned and possibly suffered a traumatic brain injury. Needless to say, times were tough and I wasn’t the most loving big sister.

Sometimes in life we have to own the moments we aren’t proud of and here is one of mine. I remember calling my little brother a retard and telling him he’s in special education because he’s stupid. I would tease him, mock him, laugh at him. I used his disability against him… it was the easiest and surest way to hurt him. But those reasons are so far from why my little brother is my super power… and why I became a special ed teacher. Simply the harsh reality that many of our students face– a reality that I work hard at changing. Labels only have power if we give it to them.

I saw the other side of special education. The side very few educators, teachers, and policy makers see. I saw the experience of a child with an invisible disability that most people don’t quite understand. I saw the experience of a single mother– who had just experienced a traumatic experience with her daughter, who was struggling financially, trying to navigate a confusing system that was telling her, her son didn’t quite fit and needed help.

Through my little brother, I learned that IEP meetings are confusing for parents, it’s hard when the phone rings with way more negative messages than positive ones, it’s difficult to see your child struggle but you don’t know what to do about it. I learned how the system can capitalize on the lack of understanding from parents and what can go wrong when IEPs are not followed… or properly created and implemented by IEP teams.

When I was in graduate school to become a special education teacher and my brother was struggling with graduating from high school, I requested his special education records from his school. I didn’t even know if he still qualified or received services. I didn’t realize this experience would be a turning point in defining the type of special education teacher I wanted to be. I remember looking at his paperwork and crying. That’s a different story that is interconnected to all of this– I will share that at a different time. To make a long story short, my brother wouldn’t have graduated from high school if it wasn’t for special education. We were able to change the story of being failed by the system, to having the system open up endless possibilities by providing him the support that allowed him to graduate from high school.

I’ll never forget the time my brother told me the first and only teacher that understood him and took the time to get to know the real him, was his middle school resource teacher. My brother shared how Mr. B would find readings that fit his interests and would plan things that didn’t make school feel like school. It took him until 7th grade to find a teacher who made him feel worthy of learning. 7th grade.

When the parents at the MDT meeting asked me that question… it was like a movie trailer of my experience with my little brother playing through my mind. In my 60 second response, I shared with them that my little brother was my super power… I shared he had an IEP and a BIP. I explained that experience gave me the ability to truly see the whole child and understand the experience from all perspectives, which helps me understand my students and families better.

My super power, like my brothers disability, is invisible… yet it’s the foundation for how and why I show up to work every single day. It’s my story… it’s my perspective… my experiences. Sometimes the experiences in our lives that could break us, or cause intense anger, actually make us stronger… and maybe even become our superpower. Some superpowers you can see and other superpowers may exist but no one can see them but you. So I pose the question: what’s your superpower? 🙂

Whatever it is, I hope you know how incredible you are.

with kindness | ashley